You and Me

By: sonofabeach96

Jul 01 2015

Category: Uncategorized

4 Comments

When I left for work this morning, my wife was still asleep.  I leave quite early and this is not unusual with our work schedules being what they are.

I crawled back in for a sec and nuzzled up to her back, squeezed her tight, and whispered into her ear, “I love you”.  I love the way she responds when I do this.  That half awake, sleepy haze, the feel of her pushing back into me when she feels me there, the light moan as she turns her cheek to meet mine, and the way she grasps my arm to pull me tighter to her.

its in these little moments, the whole thing lasted less than a minute before I had to go, that I feel the depth of us.  That I feel the safety and trust that I’d longed for my entire life.  Until I met her.  I didn’t always embrace this level of intimacy and I certainly struggled with allowing myself to show her this amount of trust and vulnerability.  Even as our years together added up.

To think that I nearly lost her, and us, breaks me down emotionally.  WTF was I thinking?  Did I just assume I wasn’t worthy of her?  Yes.  Did I assume she would crush me if I let her too close my heart?  Yes.  Did I keep her at arms length all those years to protect myself from what I subconsciously figured would end in heartbreak for me?  Yes.  I just assumed that she would disappoint me like nearly every other significant person in my life had.  Pretty sad way to exist and not a good recipe for maintaining a long-term relationship.

Today, though, snuggling into her warm body, kissing her softly, feeling her response to me, made me feel overcome with emotions that were once foreign to me.  I tell her these days that these rushes of emotions I feel now are like playing in the surf and being caught by a large wave.  It’s like riding that wave, lifting you up off the sea bed, floating helplessly at the mercy of the tide and it’s out your control. It’s fun and exhilarating.  But scary too.  Then you realize, as the wave crashes around you, it carries you right up to the safety of the beach and you feel the warmth of the sun and taste the salt on your lips.  You think, “Wow, that was fun, quite a rush”.  This is what my new outlook on love and openness, and being vulnerable to her feels like to me.

driving into work this morning, in that afterglow of love i felt laying with her, listening to my iPod, and this song came up:

“You and Me”, by Pink in a duet with Dallas Green.  Another wave lifted me and carried me gently to the shore amidst the crashing and roaring of the others.

You and me!  It’s my most cherished gift.

4 comments on “You and Me”

  1. What a wonderful tribute to ur love and marriage! I’m happy for u.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thank you. It’s very special, what we have. We know we are blessed. I feel like I’m the luckiest mf’er on the planet. Wishing the same for you guys!

    Like

  3. What a beautiful tribute to your wife and to le life you 2 share. I sure hope she reads your blog and saw this!

    Liked by 1 person

    • She doesn’t necessarily read it, but I read them to her. This one made her cry. I tell her all the time that she saved me, and I truly believe that. This song hits home with me, about how we feel about each other. I’m one lucky dude, I can promise you that! 😃

      Liked by 1 person


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