Am I Overthinking This?

By: sonofabeach96

Aug 25 2015

Category: Uncategorized

38 Comments

I’m really not sure what made me decide to start this blog.  I’d been thinking about it for a while, then events regarding my dad ( Happy Fathers Day?) prompted me to go with it.  But, deep down, I’m still not sure what I’m hoping to achieve by doing this.  It’s really unlike me to be so free and easy with my inner thoughts.  Aside from my wife and closest friends, I don’t share.  Hell, people I’ve worked with and socialized with for 10 years don’t know as  much about me as y’all do now.  So, why am I doing this?

I still can’t really answer that.  My main thought was that this would become my journal.  And thats what it is.  I’m very busy, as I’m sure everyone is, and don’t always have pen and pad with me to write stuff down.  But I do always have my phone.  This fact is kind of funny actually.  I’m probably the last person you know to have gotten a cell phone.  I never wanted one.  Didn’t care to have one, allowing others unfettered access to me.  Now, I find it difficult to fathom living without the damn thing.  But, anyway.

I benefit greatly from the process of getting my thoughts out of my head and placing them on paper (digitally, that is).  It removes the traffic from my mind and sorts it into parking lots.  Without journaling, my mind races and I can’t keep my thoughts straight.  I didn’t always keep a journal but started about 4 years ago, and now I’m addicted.  This medium makes it that much easier to do.

What I didn’t expect was to have people notice or read my entries.  It still surprises me, and even baffles me a bit, that people have checked it out.   To be noticed is definitely not why I began this, as I usually shy away from attention.  That said though, I have found that I do enjoy getting comments from you guys.   It always seems odd to have someone send a comment or a like about something I’ve written, because I’m not a writer.  And some of the sites I’ve been exposed to during my short time doing this?  THEY are writers.  I’m just some dude yapping about whatever.  And, I’m doing these entries for myself, not to pile up views or follows.  I’m not basing what I post on what I perceive will be liked by others. They’re just what happens to be on my mind on a given day.  I don’t really care how many followers I have of my nonsense.  I’d be doing this even if I had no followers, or comments, or likes.  I’m not a professional blogger by any means.  I will say though, it’s nice to know I’m not alone in some of my thoughts about certain topics and to discuss these things with people who are of like mind, or with those who may offer a differing viewpoint.  And it is flattering and humbling and educational to get feedback and comments.  I have been enlightened and redirected by some of y’all, in a good way.

I also didn’t expect to be so interested in commenting on other blogs, but I’ve been introduced to new art, music, and new ways of looking at old problems from your posts.  The dialog has been stimulating, educational, inspiring, and funny.   I didn’t expect to meet so many new and interesting people.  And I sure didn’t expect to be having conversations with them about deep and sometimes very personal topics.  I’m not exactly an extrovert and discussing these personal topics with strangers is way out of character for me.  I made a post about that very thing a couple of weeks ago (Anonymous Courage).

So, with all that being said, I have some questions and hope to get feedback from some of you who have been at this longer, so I can do this blog/journal for myself, and do it without pissing anybody off in the process.  If I’m gonna do this, I might as well try to make it the best I can.  I figure you guys who’ve been doing this for a while may have advice or constructive criticism.  I’m open to feedback or opinions.

  1. Am I too “wordy” in my responses and comments?  I tend to get that way at times and people tune me out if I ramble.  Should I tone it down a notch?
  2. Do I hijack others’ posts?  I don’t mean to, at all.  I swear that’s not my intention.  I don’t think my opinions are any better or more important than anyone else’s.  I just get caught up in having a conversation with some of you.  I hope I’m not wearing out my welcome when commenting and conversing with you.  I realize this isn’t the same forum as texting or emailing a friend, but I sense that I treat this in the same manner.  Do I overstep boundaries when doing that?
  3. Do my posts make any sense?  I’m really just kinda rambling most of what I’m writing.  Thoughts pop in, I try to record them.  For me, mainly.  But, if people are gonna read them, I hope I make a point, or at least make sense.
  4. Am I too all over the place?  I really don’t have a specific “theme” that dominates my entries.  I’ve likened it to when George and Jerry pitched their show-about-nothing to tv execs on Seinfeld.  This really is a mix of whatever.  I guess music is a “theme” of sorts because I always incorporate it into what I’m talking about.  That’s just so I can look back and see what I was listening to at a given time.  It’s my timeline and gives me clues about my moods on those days.  Does it seem that I’m pushing music on you?  That’s not my intention.
  5. Do I give unsolicited advice?  If so, I don’t mean to.  I mean well and I’m not trying to push an agenda or anything.  I’m very open minded and I have no preconceived opinions of anyone based on what they post.  If I read a post and I think I may have something to add, I try to offer up what I think may be good advice or encouragement or a rational and thoughtful opinion.  Is that assumptive and/or patronizing of me?  You may not give two shits about my advice or encouragement or opinion.  Should I just keep it to myself?
  6. And, piggybacking off 5), by doing this, am I being a bit arrogant and  narcissistic?  I mean, do I really think so much of my thoughts that I need to espouse them to the residents of WordPress?  Or am I really just releasing my inner demons so I can gain a better perspective on them, irregardless of whether I get views, likes, and comments or not?  I know that my reasons are for the latter but how does it come off?
  7. Is my language, at times, a turn-off for some?  I’m sorry if so, but I write what I think.  And when I think, sometimes my language can be salty.  I’ll clean it up a bit if necessary.

These are some of the things I’ve been wondering about.  I’m new to this, only having started a little over a month ago.  I am really enjoying the unexpected side effects of doing this.  Some of you guys have been too cool for school with me and my nonsensical thoughts.  It’s been a real pleasure to have made your acquaintances.   I had decided I would try it and see if it worked for me.  So far it has, and I plan on continuing.  But if I’m offensive, rude, overbearing, offer unwanted advice, or hijack a post, please don’t hesitate to tell me so.  I can handle being told to buzz off and I can usually take a hint.  I don’t want to create bad vibes or have others resent something I’m doing or saying.  I hope everyone who’s interacted with me or has checked out my site has enjoyed it.  I dont really plan to change how I run my blog in terms of what I talk and write about.  It’s mine, ya know? But, if my interactions on your sites needs altering, I’d be open to suggestions.  Then again, maybe I’m just over-thinking this.

So, in honor of potentially going too far, wearing out ones welcome, doing something cathartic, and writing something for all to see, my songs of the day are:

  1. “PaperBack Writer” by the Beatles
  2. “Another Place To Fall” by KT Tunstall
  3. “Shades of Gray” by Robert Earl Keen
  4. “Cool Meditations” by Third World
  5. “The Horizon Has Been Defeated” by Jack Johnson

38 comments on “Am I Overthinking This?”

  1. I can relate to you in on so many levels here, except that I am not a dude ( needed to clarify, in case there was some confusion). I enjoy reading your ramblings, they are often quite amusing. As far as 1,2,5&6 I say no. I enjoy the conversations we have had, your comments etc. Which is weird because I really don’t care for people? What is this blogging world doing to me? I don’t recall you giving me any advice yet. But you know what advice is like, you tell people something and they snub it and 6 months later, they are doing it but it’s their idea so it’s all good. Answer 3 – I think so…😉 4&7 – Personally, I think the idea of limiting to a “theme” is bullshit. Why can’t your blog be like a grocery store, a one stop shop? How many blogs would a person need to direct the various avenues of your mind? Ps. I like the parking lot analogy. Sorry for the essay answer, I like to ramble too.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Thanks a bunch, and no need to apologize for rambling. I’d rather get that kind of answer than one-word responses. I really didn’t know “how” I was supposed to do all this. I’m kinda winging it. I’m not gonna change how I do my site, but I don’t want to piss people off on their sites, ya know. I’ve seen some people asking for others to “follow” them in order to reach a certain number. I don’t give a shit about that. Do you get a prize or something? I don’t care about that. But if someone comments I’m apt to start conversing with them. Now who’s rambling? Thanks for reading. Love reading your too! 😃

      Liked by 2 people

      • Thanks! Let me ramble a little more then ☺ I am not a stat checker either. I have, but it no longer interests me to see how many people pass by without commenting. I am not interested in the number of followers that a site has or how many I obtain. I do not have a goal for that and even if there was a prize, I may not participate because I don’t do competition. That being said, I am amazed that any would follow me at all. Also, the more followers I have, the more I feel like I owe them something. Suddenly, I overthink things like content and punctuation….those are the times when I just remind myself that I am doing this for myself. If I tried to gear my posts to please people I would probably drive myself crazy. ☺ Thanks for listening/reading ☺

        Liked by 2 people

      • As usual, you hit it on the head. I agree with all of that. I have over 40 people following me now. That baffles me! But the thing is, there’s around 10-12 of you guys who I really speak with. I guess most just peruse, and that’s fine. Those of you that I do chat with consistently are awesome, present company included. Please don’t feel any pressure to post stuff on mine or respond to every comment I make. People are busy, I get it, believe me! Just glad to hang with y’all periodically! And your posts are great! Of course people follow yours! Duh! 😃

        Liked by 2 people

      • Thanks for the compliment☺ and I never feel any pressure. My reply to you today was some things that I have been thinking about lately. You just gave me an opportunity to vent them 😉

        Liked by 2 people

      • Glad I could provide ya a forum for that. 😃

        Liked by 2 people

    • I listened. That’s a horrible situation to be in. It sounds as if he’s in Houston. I hope he finds a bit of help. Sometimes a boost is all we need to get back on track. I feel for him. I’ve been in similar situation before. It feels hopeless. Hard to find the good when you feel that bad.

      Liked by 2 people

  2. Ah, your post is back!

    Hope my comment yesterday about the reason why I don’t blog didn’t lead to you overthinking things 😳 Here are my answers to the questions you are tossing about ~

    1) No.
    2) I found your blog through what I thought were appropriate comments you made on another blog.
    3) Yes.
    4) No! I like the eclecticness! My brain works like that all the time 😉
    5) See #2
    6) I’m thinking if bloggers don’t want comments, they disable that option? Sometimes it’s much easier to discuss heartfelt things anonymously.
    7) Not to me.

    Btw, I still haven’t figured out if I’m an introverted extrovert or an extroverted introvert in life, but I certainly don’t seem to be introverted online!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Rules are lame. There are no blog cops. Write YOU and those who enjoy will follow. 🙂 The others? This ain’t about them.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. I like your posts, I like your comments and I like your spontaneous style. So I say, keep doing what you’re doing and don’t think so much of your questions in this post. I had similar thoughts in the beginning, but when I learned more about the blogging thing I noticed that I like the spontaneous posts best. You are good at such writing.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I thought the same things too when I started blogging initially. I soon got so interested in other a and other people’s sippor, like yours, fuel me to write even more. And I don’t think you’re any of those things, but it’s your blog so I think people can either accept or reject your advice, they are thes who clicked to read the post right? 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Ur not too wordy, ur never offensive, u don’t hijack and I like that u have all different topics. It’s a reflection of u and that’s what we respond to. So keep up the good work!!! Lol

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Oh and u don’t give unsolicited advice. As ur first follower heehee, I enjoy you and you help me stay positive. I’m a big fan so thanks!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. […] Over at Sonofabeach I read a post that I think we all can relate to. The constant thoughts about how to blog right. Am I Overthinking This? | sonofabeach96 […]

    Liked by 1 person

  9. I ask myself about #6 as well. your blog is whatever you want it to be; I just like seeing others’ thought processes (like yours) transcribed into words.

    you seem sincere and nice enough ^^

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Your blog is perfect the way it is and it’s “your” blog so don’t ever over think it. I love reading your comments and our back and forth conversations are always welcome. So keep doing what you are doing. I think a lot of the bloggers keeping track of stats are either blogging for living or hopping to publish their work some day, I could be wrong but it looks like that. Me, I like to see the stats but I’m not even sure they are all that accurate and I truly have no concept of what great stats are… Keep blogging and don’t restrict yourself!

    Liked by 1 person


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